Everything I am...

Throughout college, praising God through music was a powerful form of prayer for me. Here in Honduras, I am able to “sing a new song to the Lord,” in a new language! Before leaving, I thought it would be difficult to give up my favorite praise and worship songs in English, but as usual, I was focusing more on what I would lose than on what I would gain. The words to one of these new songs have been especially significant for me, as a new missionary in our community: “Todo lo que soy, todo lo que tengo, todo lo que quiero, todo lo que sueño, a ti Señor Jesús, te entrego.” (Everything I am, everything I have, everything I want, everything I dream, to you Lord Jesus, I surrender).

Some days during the past 3 weeks I have prayed these words joyfully, thanking God for the opportunity to really wake up each day and spend myself completely for Him. Some days I pray them with exasperation, feeling poor and useless. But the words of this song keep causing me to realize that our God longs to be our Provider; in fact, His heart burns for it! But He allows us the freedom to allow Him in, and we can only do that when we don’t leave our options open: Christ is our only option! And He is everything.

This was made clear to me during last week’s mission to the mountain town of Guajiquiro and its surrounding villages. The night before we left, we were blessed with an extended night of prayer and praise before the Blessed Sacrament, asking God to pour forth His Holy Spirit upon us again as He did at Pentecost. And send us forth He did, to the unknown, like the branches from His vine. All we had to bring to the villagers was Christ, literally—in His sacraments (Fr. Juan Diego, cfr was with my team).

Each night in the village we had a holy hour with the villagers. On the last night I was sitting in the back row of the chapel, sharing my candle and song sheet with Luis Alfredo, a 7-year-old who had been joining us all week. As we sat and shared Christ’s light, my fellow missioner Juan Carlos began the song… “Todo lo que soy, todo lo que tengo…” I looked up at Christ, humbly gazing at us from the altar, thanking Him for what He had done that week with our willingness to serve Him through our simplicity, poverty, and faith that He was at work. Lord, let us be living monstrances, displaying your love to everyone we encounter. When all we have is You, we have more than enough.